What NOT to do When in a Psych Room

I currently have not one, not two, but three security guards stationed outside my psych room. I have not attacked anyone. Instead, I keep accidentally stumbling across psych room faux pas…

1.) Under NO circumstances climb on the furniture- perhaps you're wondering why I would climb on the furniture in the first place…

I have been in this same room ALL day. There is nothing to do but stare at the walls and wait while other people decide what to do with you. The problem is that the only windows are near the top of the ceiling and by now I was dying to look at anything other than the psych room walls. If you weren't mad before, you certainly would be within 20mins of this place.

Yes, there are CCTV cameras, but I didn't think they'd be watching me 24/7, right? So I climbed on the back of the single piece of furniture in the room (a long sofa, bolted to the ground) to try and get a look of the outside world. Immediately, all security guards ran into my room.

Won't be trying that one again!

2.) Don't forget your mooncup is in a toiletry bag inside your backpack. This will result in the nurse that is searching your bag literally squealing in horror. (It was obviously sterilised in my defence)

3.) Don't move quickly- you must move as slowly as possible at all times. Failure to comply with this rule will result in you unintentionally scaring the shit out of some poor nurse. If you move at a normal speed, people tend to think you're about to attack them.

4.) Don't have too much of your body under the blanket at any one time. Otherwise people get quite freaked out that you're hiding something (despite already having searched through all your possessions)

I'll update this list as I stumble across more faux pas. I have a feeling that I'm in for one heck of a long night!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑

%d bloggers like this: