This past week has been packed full of medical appointments, I’ve had eight appointments in 5 days! I’m still walking like a duck on drugs, and we’re still not much closer to understanding why.
Sometimes I can walk normally, if a bit clumsily, but other times I can only walk a few steps before falling to the floor. I’m getting really anxious about going out now. I never know when an episode will come on and I’m terrified that I’ll get ‘stuck’ on the floor when I’m outside. Being stuck on the floor in your own flat is one thing, but I don’t know what I’d do if I fell and couldn’t get back up when I was in the middle of the street (or worse, the middle of the road).
The first MRI I had done was of my spine. The results came back yesterday and no abnormalities were found.
I expected to be relieved to get the all clear on my spinal MRI, but that wasn’t the case. I realised that I was ‘hoping’ that the problem would be with my spine; that way, it could be managed and hopefully fixed. A spinal problem, whilst debilitating, is unlikely to kill me. Now that that’s been ruled out, the remaining potential causes are less benign. The options left are brain lesions/plaques, brain damage, tumours or neurological disorders (most of which are progressive).
I had an MRI of my brain earlier today and will hopefully get the results in the next few days. If there are no obvious lesions or tumours, I will be referred to a neurologist. In the NHS, neurologist referrals can take upward of 6 months. That’s a long time not knowing what’s wrong. Especially, as to get any support in the NHS, you need a diagnosis. I won’t even be able to get a wheelchair without a diagnosis!
I wish there were some witty quips I could make about this situation, but it’s all fairly bleak.
I’ll keep you guys updated with what’s going on xx